And we're back!

Well, I had to work yesterday, so I guess that means my break is over. There were some really good things about break and some really bad things about break. I guess I will share with you two good things about my break.

First of all, traffic going over Snoqualmie Pass was was completely stopped for about 45 mintues. I don't even know why. I was expecting at least a little bit of snow on the road when we finally went over. Nope. Completely clear. BUT. While I was enjoying that 45 minute wait, something funny happened. I opened my mineral water and it projectile exploded all over my car. It was a very shocking event. There was a full liter before I opened it and the bottle was only half full after the explosion. It hit all six windows in my car and got everything all soggy. But it was so funny that I just started laughing. Really hard. All by myself and soaking wet in my car. With 4 lanes of stopped traffic looking on.

Secondly, I got to see a lot of my Canadian peeps. AND I met R4 (Jordan Ratcliffe)!

<---- I thought that this arm shot (taken by the Colonel) was pretty impressive.


Well, I just wanted to share a couple of little bits of my whole Christmas experience. I hope yours was good.

Nothing says Merry Christmas like...

Hey, isn't that Fresh's house?

Well, friends, I am off for my Christmastime adventures. I'll be driving over the mountains to Wenatchee tomorrow morning (hopefully my car makes it?) to visit the grandma and great grandmas. Then I'll be heading to my friend Jessica's house in Nooksack on Christmas morning and to my mom's house in Maple Falls for Christmas dinner. After that I plan on gallavanting around British Columbia for a couple of days. THEN!!! The incredible Gen Sofie of Chicago is going to stay with me in Seattle for a few days!!! This is perhaps the most exciting thing of all, for Gen is my homey and I miss her a freaking lot.

I think that's about all I have to say.

Have a really wonderful Christmas.

Vote for A Pony!

It all started on Thursday when I awoke with an annoying little tingle in my throat. I tried to ignore it, but I had a feeling that the worst was on its way. Friday morning it was no longer a tingly throat. It was a sore throat. Saturday the phlegm started. Sunday it was the snot. Yesterday it was fatigue and today my eyes are watering uncontrollably. I won't even talk about how cold I have been throughout this whole progression. Anyways. It is official. I am sick.

I have done very little to help myself get better. A list of my poor choices since it began: staying up until 4am on Friday night, singing (more like shouting) Christmas carols at the top of my lungs at Gasworks Park, doing parking services outside for 7 hours this weekend, eating cookies for dinner last night and breakfast this morning. Uh... Oops, shouldn't have done that.

By the way, if you understand the title (which is completely unrelated to this post), then it is very likely that you are my archenemy.

One too many?

Don't be fooled by my happy face. Job number 4 is the least fun of my jobs. I work in a parking lot during weekend UW basketball games. It is cold. I have to stand in dark parking lots by myself at night while carrying $200 cash. Is that even safe? I bet it is not. Maybe I could sue somebody. I'm American, give me money.

Timber!

The picture on the left is me 'standing' next to a tree. The picture on the right is the tree. It fell over in the storm. Pretty tricky, I think.

hot

Look what I found on YouTube! Such a nice bum.

trees at sandpoint tree lot are half off

Look at how charming that tree is. I even tied some of the branches up to make it look like it has a bit of a top. But it sort of made it look like it is falling over.

the tree is half full

Today was a very fun day for work because my mission was to go out and find us a Christmas tree for our room at school. It was supposed to be a Charlie Brown Christmas tree. (This is particularly funny because I work at a school of millionaire children.)

"I need the ugliest cheapest tree you have." That is what I told the man.

This is where the story gets good. Apparently the going rate for a regular Christmas tree is in the neighborhood of $50. For an ugly cheap tree, it is $25. I thought that was a little much for the worst tree on the lot, so I asked if he had anything else.

He sure did.

He sold me half of a Christmas tree for $5. The bottom half. Apparently someone bought the original tree but did not want the bottom. So, thanks to me, we have the bottom half of a Christmas tree in our room at school. It makes me smile.

Eek

I won't go into much detail here. Let me just say that the end result of digesting that scone led me to the decision that I should not eat another one. Even if it's free.

5 minutes ago

"Do you want to try a highly experimental scone?"
-my barista

I am trying it right now. Look how blue it is!

Hairy Situation

This hair cutting business has been fun, but it is time to grow my hair out again. In fact, I've been growing it out for a couple of weeks now.

There are a couple of reasons for this. First of all, I really miss my ponytail. Secondly, my neck is cold. These two things have come to greatly outweigh the joys of cutting my own hair.

Now I will be experiencing the awkward in between short and long phase. Also, since the sides are a bit shorter than the back, I have been compulsively trimming the back to prevent anything that resembles a mullet.

-----

In completely unrelated news, I have been quite busy this week. Besides working from 6:45am-6pm every day, I have taken an evening class, gone to a baking party, and created the most beautiful birthday card I have ever made. Just so you know, I am pretty decent at making birthday cards, so it was a big deal for me.

It's incredible how quickly I brush aside basic things when I am busy. Yesterday during my morning shift, for example, I couldn't for the life of me remember the last time I showered. I know I showered after the retreat. Usually I can remember the last time I showered because the answer is usually "this morning." Gross. So, I went home on my morning break and showered. Then yesterday afternoon I couldn't for the life of me remember the last time I ate vegetables. So I went and got a slice of veggie pizza during my lunch break. Pizza counts as veggies, okay?

Anyways, the point is that taking care of yourself is generally a good idea. Or maybe the point is that I should be doing my laundry on my lunch break instead of blogging. Because I definitely can't remember the last time I did that. Either way, I think I have learned some sort of lesson at some point this week.

Another Weekend in the Great White North

This weekend was the Jrs. Christmas Retreat at camp. It was really exciting to see a bunch of camp people whom I love dearly. I also got to sleep in cabin 0, throw snowballs at HTL, and be DJ Nooksack for the weekend.

And!!! My cool roommate joined me. Say hello to G-Ma! G-Ma was most unfortunately placed in Cabin Poop.

A couple of things that you should know about this weekend.

First of all, there were 3.2 acres of untouched snow to play in. FUN!















Secondly, I would like to let you know that the legend of world famous cabin inspectors Silvia and Poncho lives on. You might even say that Silvia and Poncho are relics.


And that is true.

I leave you with two quotes from a funny Korean camper...
"In my opinion, your snow fort sucks."
"The snow wall is strong, but it is ugly."

And now...

...we have about two inches of the aforementioned slurpee covering the entirety of Seattle.

DON'T DRINK IT!

I know it looks a lot like it might be the yummy cola flavor, but it is actually the nasty dirt flavor. Just trust me on this one.

Tasty is not quite the right word for it.

Monday it rained Dippin' Dots and it was amazing. Today it felt like someone was spitting Slurpee all over me and it was disgusting.

But now there are big fluffy snowflakes. Really big. Be careful. If you catch one on your tongue, you might choke.

Mmmm Tasty

Today, at about 4:30pm, Seattle was hit with a strange sort of hail... or was it snow? I'm not really sure what to call it. All I can confidently tell you is that it looked exactly like it was raining Dippin' Dots. You know, "the ice cream of the future." We took the kids outside to investigate (even though it was dark and cold) and I am conviced that a Dippin' Dots factory in the sky blew up tonight right over Seattle. Really. They even had the texture of Dippin' Dots. Quite tasty, I have to say.

Who Am I?

I tried to log into my messenger account today and it told me that my password was invalid. "Hm. Maybe I typed it wrong," I thought to myself. Another try. Still wrong. Try again. Focus, Ashley. I slowly typed in every character of my password. Nope. Still wrong. I sat back. I stared down my computer screen. Suddenly it dawned upon me. My password has been changed! How could I forget? Type new password. And I'm in.

my visit to calgary, home of sam

As you may have gathered from my previous post about my observation of snow in Seattle, I am back from my long weekend in Calgary (which also happens to be the home of world famous professional basketball player Sam Thomson). My last weekend report was really long, so I'm going to limit myself to telling you 5 things that happened this weekend.

1. On my way out of my apartment door, my roommate gave me an apple to eat on my way to the airport. I put it in my purse and totally forgot about it until I arrived in Calgary and put my stuff into Sam's car. As you may know, a person cannot just bring produce from the land of brown cream soda (USA) into the land of duotangs (Canada). I didn't really know the best thing to do. Bringing the apple back to my country would really only make things worse for myself. Sam thought I should throw it out the window, but I was afraid of leaving evidence of my heinous crime. So I ate it. All of it. Stem, core, and seeds included.

2. I watched a 2 year old white girl eat a full plate of spicy Indian food like it was candy. It was remarkable.

3. I went snowboarding with Sam and her cousin Kaila. It was the coldest I have ever been in my life. I even started to cry when we took a break in the lodge. My face was dethawing and it felt like it was on fire. It was one of my wussier moments in life. I did not warm up until nap time. I had one of the most amazing naps of my life on that day, by the way. And I take a lot of naps, so that is really saying something.

4. I forgot to go potty before I went to bed on Saturday night. As if I were a camper at camp, I told Sam before I left her room that I was going to go use the bathroom. Anyways. I went potty and then back to Sam's room and into bed. After a few minutes, I got comfortable again and began to try to fall asleep. All of a sudden, this person popped up from beside Sam's bed! It creeped me right out! Then I realized that it was not just any person. It was Sam herself! She hid from me when I left to use the bathroom and I did not even notice that she was gone. How do you not notice a person missing from the bed you are sleeping in? I don't know. I guess you just skip over those details sometimes.

5. Sam and I absolutely destroyed Colin and Sunshine Jenny at Dutch Blitz. Okay, that is a big lie. In fact, Jen had more points than the rest of us combined. But I DID catch Jen cheating. Also, if anyone is wondering what to get Sam for her birthday, I bet that she would really like a lifetime subscription to the National Enquirer.

Okay, my five point plan did not make this post much shorter than it would have been otherwise. Oh well.


By the way, it is snowing like crazy now! Maybe the Catholic school kids will not have school tomorrow? Meaning maybe I won't have work tomorrow?

Am I back?

Today, upon my return from Calgary, I exited the Sea-Tac Airport to find snow. And not the normal mixed watery snow that we usually get in Seattle. It was white and fluffy. I just thought it was kind of funny that I came back to usually mild Seattle after the coldest weekend of my life and found more snow.

The Best Thing Happening on December 15

I will now shamelessly advertise something very good. Future Island is an elementary school in Offinso, Ghana that has outgrown its facilities. Construction for a new school is underway, but funding for this effort is desperately needed. My amazing friend Glorya, who spent a summer volunteering at the school, has organized a benefit concert that is sure to be amazing.

FUTURE ISLAND BENEFIT CONCERT
DECEMBER 15 @7PM
TICKETS ARE $7 PRESALE, $10 AT THE DOOR
NEW LIFE CHURCH 3727 240TH SE
BOTHELL, WA 98021

This is the 2nd benefit concert that Glorya has organized and it's going to be awesome. The concert will feature 3 local Christian bands: David Cho, King's Fools, and Tim Pak. Every dollar goes directly to Future Island School. Sweet! If you live in the Seattle area, this is the place to be. If you do not live here... well, this is a good excuse for you to come visit me.

In case you are still unsure of whether you should come, here is a lovely picture of me at Future Island to sway your decision.

Ashley is an amateur saleswoman.

I am no Sam Thomson, but I have to say that I made a pretty smart business deal today. A woman came by our room this morning at work. She needed a stamp. I gave here a 39 cent stamp. She gave me 45 cents. It's in my pocket right now. I sure am feeling good about this.

The Weekend Report

Well, friends, I did some very exciting things this weekend. Here is what will hopefully be a brief account.




First, I woke up on Friday to find that my hair was quite possibly greasier than it had ever been. Look at that volume! Instead of trying to pull off the hipster look, I took a shower.





The next exciting thing happened when I tried to drive to Canada from Seattle. My lovely car started overheating, so I took it to my beloved Chevron guys to have it fixed. This is Geoff fixing my car.


This is me having a camera and being bored while Geoff fixes my car.




















Eventually my car was fixed and I was off for a problem free drive to the land of duty teachers and pink cream soda.





My destination was Sunshine Jenny's house. She gave me her address, but I figured that I would just be able to remember where her house is. I did not. I drove around for about 10 minutes and realized that it was going to take awhile for me to find it, so I took a coffee break at Grab-a-Java. Jen called me while I was there and told me how to get there.

Jen and I had chocolate cake and chocolate milk. We later met Cassy and John-Mark at Grab-a-Java (that's twice in one day for me!). Cassy was wearing orange and she was also having trouble using her inside voice. Jen bit her bagel into the shape of a person. Due to the bagel hole, we had to assume that this person had been gutted. She later made it into the shape of a dog which had all of its guts.

We played a game involving pigericks and leaning jowlers at Deb's house. We also played Dutch Blitz. We all partied like we got +20 the whole time.

I then found Toast's house and we starting our trip to Langley to scare the Bujesus out of Sam, who was at West Jet's house. My car overheated again! So we sat in my car on the side of the road. After it cooled down we started driving again. Then my car overheated again! A friendly motorist stopped to help us, but really just told us to go back. We went a little further. My car overheated again! So we went back to Deb's house and played a trivia game from the early 90s. It was quite enjoyable. Then Colin and his sister came, too! But he is No Fun so we all left shortly after.

I took the scenic route to West Jet's house in the morning after Sunshine's dad fixed my car. Not only did I get to see Sam and WJ, I got a really great present. A rat, in fact. A dead one. Thanks guys! I spent the day with Lauren Jet, who was sick. We did tons of fun and crazy things that are too top secret to blog about.

On Sunday I went to church, went to lunch, and then put Cassy down for her nap. This is when Sam, my brother, and I went to the Colonel's house to play. Luckily I know exactly where it is or we might have gotten lost. Mikayla saved us from moldy hair and Mitch launched cars into the walls. It was great fun. When it was time for Cassy's nap to be over, we went back to her house to play tickle the Baby Girl and tickle the brother, both fun.

I then got coffee and a non-caffeinated beverage for my brother, who is trying to grow. After that we had to wait in the Tim Horton's parking lot for a mysterious man to bring us a bag. We could not go into Tim Horton's because the power was out. So we sat in my car in a dark dark parking lot.




We are very scared of the dark.






After Austin got his bag, I drove him home and then drove myself home.

That is all.

Sam is a professional cabin inspector.

Sam like Sylvia mucho.

Sam is a professional math teacher.

Sam is a professional dragon slayer.

A dragon slayer! Very cool, Sam.

Sam is a professional saleswoman.

You cannot deny that this one is true.

Sam is a professional basketball player.

I don't know how I didn't find out sooner!

Sam is a professional unicyclist.

Professional Sam

You may or may not know that my friend Sam is a modest girl. She excels at so many things, but rarely mentions them to anyone. With her aprehensive permission, I am here to tell you about all of the different professions that Sam holds.

Dreams Do Come True

I do not know why hitchhiking is so appealing to me. Whenever I go anywhere, I secretly hope that some component of my transportation plan will fail me and that I will be forced to hitchhike. About this time last year, this is exactly the situation with which I was faced.

After a morning of service learning work, my classmates and I decided to bike into town and go to the market. This involved borrowing enough bicycles for all of us. Most got ahold of a bike, but some of us were going to have to go in pairs.

I partnered with a tiny Japanese girl, Terumi. Needless to say, I was to do the pedalling and she was to ride on the back. This is one of those times when I overestimated my own strength.

Had I been taking a bike path while riding a fancy road bike, carrying Terumi would have been easy enough. Using a single speed bike on a hilly dirt road in Ghana was not as easy. In fact, I gave up as we began to climb the third hill. As it would likely have been physically impossible for Terumi to pedal both of us up the hill, we began the long walk into town (10 kilometers, I was told).

Not 5 minutes into our walk,a motorcyclist skidded to a dirt cloud of a stop in front of us and waited until our walking feet reached him.

"White girls, what are you doing?"
"We're going to town, but we only have one bike."
"Oh! One will ride on my moto!"

Terumi and I looked at each other. My dream of hitchhiking was about to come true. Terumi wanted the bike, so I hopped on the motorcycle. This is the first and only time I have hitchhiked. It is also the first and only time I have been on a motorcycle. I found both experiences to be most enjoyable.

A friend who we passed along the way realized that it was me on the back of the motorcycle in time to take this picture.

my socks right now

The left is medium length and black with gray and white argile. It's quite nice, actually.

The right is an old, ankle length basketball sock with a very large hole in the heel.

I think I need to do my laundry.

Parentheses

It has been raining all week, so we have been having indoor recess. For this, I simply walk up and down the halls monitoring classrooms.

Today I passed by the 5th grade classroom to see one of the funniest things I have seen in a long time. A kid got his sweatshirt stuck on a bracket of his braces. A lower part of the sleeve. I have no idea how it happened, but it was very stuck. So he was just helplessly standing there with his arm dangling from his mouth.

I felt quite heroic as I pushed through his crowding classmates to carefully pull his sweatshirt off of the bracket.

Bad!

I have some terrible news.

The bread dumpsters are GONE!!!

I drove down there to get some bread for lunch and they were just missing. I have no idea where they went or where the Essential Baking Company is now dumping their old bread. This is horrible. That was about half of my diet. GONE!

For Robyn and Sunshine

Well, there have been two requests for a picture of the hair. So, here you go kids. It's a bit Photoshoppy because I have been playing with Photoshop lately. Sorry if that bothers you.


I think I might grow it out, but then I will have to deal with that awkward in between phase. We'll see.

Oh Canada

"Look! We found a leaf that fell off of a Canadian tree!" said the kid who was holding the maple leaf.

Chaperone

Last night was really fun because I got to chaperone trick-or-treaters. It was especially fun because the trick-or-treaters were my supervisor and her friend, both of whom are significantly older than I am. Ridiculous, you say? Yes. Yes, it was. How do adults go trick or treating without being found out, you ask? Simple. They dress up as a giant sack of potatoes.



There are two things that I would like you to note about this picture. First, that there are only two people in that sack. They are carrying three candy baskets. Second, that the dude is handing out full size candy bars! The drive to suburbia paid off after all.




Does the scam actually work? Check it out...

Sooo Good

Here are some fabulous things about my weekend:

-My car (which I will tell you about later) made it all the way to Mission and back and it ran like a champion. Also, my car is insured now.

-I carved a sweet pumpkin which I knew I would not be able to take across the border. But that was okay because I got to put it somewhere in Mission.

-I found the TUMS that I left at camp after last summer and took them home with me.

-I got to watch an adult get into a high chair.

-I opened my sleeping bag and was reminded that I should really be watching out for the Bedtime Bandit.

-I lit a freaking huge fire.


Overall, I really enjoyed my weekend at BOOFEST. I got to see a lot of people I love and I got to be at camp. It was thoroughly enjoyable. And now I get to go back to work and things. Whelp, that's all I have for you, folks.

When Scared

Kindergartener: "Miss Ronnell! I went to a haunted house yesterday and it was so scary!"

Me: "Whoa! Did you scream?"

Kindergartener: "Nope. I just cried."


(sorry most of my posts are about kindergarteners. they are just so much funnier than i am.)

Oh, Brother

"I'm surprised Mom hasn't yelled at us for no reason yet."
-Austin (my bro)

My brother, my mom, my mom's boyfriend, my baby cousin Dylan (who I was babysitting), and I went to Wentachee for the weekend for my great-grandma's 85th birthday party, which meant a lot of driving. My brother and I spent the weekend goofing off and causing small scenes in public places, which is where the quote comes from. That is all.

Quote

"You have to actually move the eraser around on the paper for the words to go away."
-Ms. Prepotente, to a Kindergartener

The Long Haircut

Sunday I gave myself a trim. It was so liberating to cut my own hair that I cut it a little shorter on Monday. Tuesday I layered it. Wednesday I evened out the layers. Thursday I made the layers a little shorter. Friday I evened out those layers. I took the weekend off. I thought I was finished, but then today I changed a couple of things that were bugging me. It's pretty short. I have never actually had my hair this short before. Except for when I was born (not everyone is born with a ponytail, you know).

I think one day I'm going to make a wrong cut and just say, "Ooops. Shouldn't have done that."

Piñata Tag, Thanksgiving Style

Piñata Tag is a two person game, so it was the logical thing for Cassy and I to do while I was at her house. But the game was played by a couple of different rules because we were in Canada. In Canada, also known as the Great White North, you start by wrapping a person's entire face with approximately 10 scarves, leaving a mouth slit for breathing. That person is the piñata and, in our case, that piñata is me. The piñata will be completely blind and, if done right, mostly deaf.

After wandering around looking for Cassy for about 15 minutes she sneakily jumped out of who knows where, grabbed me around the waist, and nearly scared the cabin six out of me! I didn't pee my pants, but I did let out the loudest scream that I have ever unintentionally let out, I think.

This variation of the game is most enjoyable, even for the piñata. I don't recommend playing this variation in extremely warm places, nor do I recommend it for anyone who thinks they might have to use the bathroom soon.

Kindergarten Vocabulary

The Kindergarten teacher put on music for the children to listen to while doing their work. It was Kenny G. Here is the conversation that followed:

Kindergartener says, "Is this Lebanese music?"

Teacher says, "No, this is Kenny G. He's a saxophone player. See, the cd cover has his picture on it."

Kindergartener says, "Oh. He's sexy!"


This kid is five years old and his vocabulary includes the word sexy. I don't use that word. Was he even using it properly? You be the judge...


And while we're at it, I think there is another Kenny who we should consider...


Yes, folks, that is the one and only country music sensation Kenny Hess.


(Side note: I appologize if someone who is reading this receives mail in the near future that contains this story. I also appologize if you now think you are getting mail from me and you don't.)

Need Help Moving?

I want to tell you a little bit about my moving experience.

I just moved about 15 blocks away from my old apartment. I do not have a car. Nor do I have a bike. But my roommate has a bike. About a week and a half ago, I decided that, with the help of my roommate and the little rack on her bike, it would be a good idea to just carry my stuff to the new place. It was a good idea for about 3 trips, When we were still carrying things like backpacks full of books and fluffy winter clothes. We thought we were funny and that it would make a good story. Then we got to things like fragile pots and dressers. Those were not fun. Because you can only hold so many fragile pots at one time and you can only put so many dresser drawers on a small bike rack. I more or less gave up and found someone with an SUV.

Sorry I could not offer you a story with a more exciting ending.

Oldsack

Your Birthdate: September 21

You're a restless rebel with an unpredictable nature. Bright but unbridled, you tend to seek out wild experiences over new ideas. People are frustrated by your great potential, but you love your unconventional life. You're a heartbreaker. People get attached to you, and then you're gone. Your strength: Your thirst for adventure Your weakness: Not taking time for slow pleasures Your power color: Hot pink Your power symbol: Figure eight Your power month: March

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Well kids, there it is. A full synopsis of my character based on the day I was born. The remarkable thing is that somebody wrote these for all the birthdays. Well then. Happy Birthday to me.

You're it.

Piñata Tag! It's a fun new game!

Supplies:
stick
colorfully decorated paper bag

Instructions:
One kid puts the paper bag over his head. He is the Piñata. He is also 'it'. Another kid holds the stick. He uses it to pound on piñata boy, giving him hints as to where stick boy is standing. If piñata boy can tag stick boy, they switch.


**This game was made up by one of my after school kids. The funnier part is that he found somebody who would play the game with him and also that I let them play.

No surprises here...

...well, except for the weird personality analysis at the end. That was unexpected. Seeing as it was a quiz about coffee.

You Are a Soy Latte

Yeah, you've got a bit of that healthy hippie thing going on But you're more Kate Hudson urban bohemian than Phish groupie You're worldly and well traveled.. and you know where to get the best coffee in town. All your experience makes you a compassionate person - and a caring girlfriend.

What Kind of Coffee Are You?

Sick, Man

I am sort of hungry. But due to my own poor cooking skills, I am on a hunger strike... against myself. This is what happened. I don't have a whole lot of food right now and Friday is not a good day at the bread dumpster. I do have potatoes, though. So, tonight I made the nastiest french fries I have ever tasted.

I don't know what I did, but this is how I explain the taste of the fries I made:

Imagine a normal potato wedge soaked for three weeks in olive oil. Actually, let's make that motor oil. Imagine the oiled potato wedge quickly fried so that it is slightly crisped on the outside and incredibly soggy on the inside. Drop the wedge in a puddle of acid rain and then then someone who has been rubbing his feet across cabin six's carpet for six straight weeks will clean his toes with the fry. Also, a baby opossum has gnawed on the fry and every resident of the state of Arkansas has sneezed on it.

That is more or less what they tasted like. I am now staring at a large plate of them. They are shiny and scary.

Oh, Crap.

My reward for leaving Camp Luther 2006 (also known as the summer of poop) is doing my homework, which includes problem solving of Body Fluids Scenario #1:

"Eliza, age six, wasn't feeling well. Before she could get to the bathroom, she had a diarrhea attack and didn't make it in time."

How can I do my homework if I can't stop laughing?

Recess

Pending references, I have a job as a recess lady. I am very excited about this because I remember all of the interesting things that I used to do at recess time. I shall now tell you about one such experience. Please do not think less of me for it.


In 4th grade, I was the Co-President of the Crane Fly Mating Club. Every day before recess, our Vice President would empty his pencil box. When the bell rang for recess, we met in the large field, which is also home to hundreds of crane flies. The purpose of the club was to catch crane flies that were either in the middle of mating or female crane flies that were pregnant. It was rather educational. Female crane flies, for example, have pointy butts, whereas the males have rounded butts. If we caught mating or pregnant crane flies, we would put them in the pencil box for further examination. When the bell rang, we would bring the catch of the day into the classroom. The crane flies typically died in the pencil box 5-10 minutes after recess ended.

I hope the kids at this school are as cool as I was.

The Bread Dumpster.

The most amazing thing happened to me last night. Becky was driving me back to my apartment when all of a sudden she took a sharp detour to the Essential Baking Company. It was nearly midnight and the bakery was definitely not open. But we were not going to the bakery, we were going to the dumpsters. And what did we find?

THREE DUMPSTERS FULL OF DELICIOUS ORGANIC BREAD!

Some of it was rock hard. You probably could have clobbered someone to death with some of that bread. But some of it was still soft. Still soft and still in the original bags! What a gold mine. And since I just got back to Seattle yesterday and haven't bought any groceries, I'm going to see how long I can live off of bread. Free bread. Dumpster bread.

Boys, Makeup, and Ichiro's Bum

Boys whine a lot.

I wore makeup on Thursday. Lots of makeup. More makeup than I have ever in my life worn at one time. I don't know how, but I was peer pressured to do this by a small group of 12-14 year olds.

Ichiro has a nice bum. When at Safeco, get the seats in right field.

Businesswomen! At Summer Camp?!

My first ever business venture is successfully underway. It goes like this:

Sam and I take a weekly drive to the United States of America and buy as much brown cream soda as possible. When we return to camp, we both start drinking a lot of the delicious beverage. Since we are clearly the two coolest people at camp, everyone else starts trying to get their hands on some of our goods. Because they want to be cool like us. They eventually find that it is not from the canteen, but from our own special supply. And the, BAM! The kids are willing to fork out whatever we ask for a can. Since we are honest businesswomen, we sell for a reasonable price of 75 cents. It's going quite well, I have to say. We also have Red Vines, Butterfinger BBs, and Uh-Oh Oreos available in exchange for brief stints of slavery.

See Cabin 0 if interested.

Do the Duotang

I got one. Duotang will be at camp next week, my friends.

Camp Names

Staff training has concluded.

The best part of staff training is when new staff pick their camp names.

This year, we had the following:

Wonk

Oasis

Astro Boy

Fresh Prints

Kno Phun

Outhouse

Contagious (but spelled in some different way)

Salmon

Not bad. The goal now is to name a junior counselor "Duotang," one of my favorite Canadian words. I don't know if it will work out though. If only Phen was here, she can talk anyone into any name. It's true.

Footsie

Yesterday I wore flip flops for the first time in over a year, at the request of Jacquelyn (my sister). I have Chacos and they're really comfy, so I usually just wear those.

Thusly, the sun has given my feet big Zs on them. Some people thing this is awesome, some think it is disgusting (Jacquelyn, for example). I am more or less indifferent. What do you think? Should I get rid of the stripes?

These are my feet (the ones on top) at their worst (or best).

so sad

Well guys, Ghana lost to the mighty Brazilians this morning. I'm not going to lie, I shed a few tears. For some reason I get really emotional when I watch sports. I'm famous for tearing up while watching SportsCenter. I know it's lame because it's usually just millionaire athletes doing their jobs, but this time it was Ghana, which is different. Well, I'm done embarrasing myself for the day.

Bread!

(this one's for you, aquasoft)

Picture this. It is 6am in Ghana. Naturally, I am asleep. Oh! But what is this shouting that awakens me? Why, it is the booming voice of the bread lady. She shouts:

"Bread!
Fresh buttah bread!
Sugah bread!
Brown bread!
Tea bread!"

Do I get some bread? Of course I do. Do I eat half a loaf and go back to bed? Yes, yes I do.

(i miss my homie!)

here i am

Judging by the smelly smell, I am back in Nooksack. Yup, Nooksack. Not much to do here, is there? Perhaps one of my friends who doesn't live too far away will give me a call and I won't be so bored anymore.



P.S.

Looks like Ghana beat up on the United States, doesn't it?

One More Thing.

Oh, did I forget to mention that Ghana freaking schooled the Czech Republic in World Cup soccer yesterday? Because that's exactly what happened. Now all they have to do is beat those danged Americanos.

Yesterday and the New Plan

I just decided to go to Wenatchee instead of going home. Mostly because cherries are in season and everybody knows that the best cherries in the world grow at my great grandma's orchard in Wenatchee.

This is not Wenatchee.

It's Seattle. You can tell because the Space Needle is there.

I had to say goodbye to my coolest friend, Gen, at 4:45 this morning. She's moving to Chicago to teach high school math. We hung out at Gasworks Park (where the picture above was taken) last night. The only real reason for hanging out there was because you can take lovely pictures at Gasworks Park. Unfortunately Gen doesn't do things on time, so we missed the sunset and good light. Then we didn't know what to do so we went back to Barbara and Gen's house. Fortunately, we are all such awesomely cool people that we freaking rocked every minute of our last hours together.

This is Gen and me. We're hugging because we love each other.


Good shot of Bobby.

Group shot. Crazy arms. I don't know why.

Just in case you aren't excited about camp yet...

...it's going to be fabulous.


(um. do you have a problem with me posting pictures of you on the internet?)

Marathoning

To demonstrate my fine athletic ability, I ran a half marathon last weekend. And now I feel like somebody beat on my legs with a bat. Maybe I will train better next time. Here's a picture of my friend Preston because he's amazing and he won the full marathon. Does anybody else think that a glass plate with a crab on it is a funny prize for a marathon winner?

And here's is our healthy post-race cool down. Yes, I'm wearing spandex.
Erin, me, Bobby.

Gen and me. Beat.

(Complicated)

Sees Cigars

Last night I recieved a really interesting gift. It was chocolate shaped and wrapped to look like a cigar. This gift awoke a range of emotions deep within my soul.

First of all, I was surprised that they even make that sort of thing. Another reason to love America.

Secondly, I was slightly disappointed because I initially thought that it was a fatty Cuban, but it was chocolate. Don't get me wrong, I love chocolate. But Cuban cigars are somewhat hard to come by. Another reason to hate America.

Finally, I was impressed with the giver of the gift. I am quite fond of both chocolate and cigars, so it was a very good choice.

World Cup

I don't follow football (soccer) too closely, but I am quite excited about the World Cup. I'll be cheering for Ghana (along with the home team, though they will be playing each other on June 22). Last October, when I was in Kumasi, I got to see one of Ghana's World Cup qualifiers. Mostly I'm cheering for Ghana because I want to wear my football jersey that I got while I was there.